isawallflower | RYSLIG; ic inbox

you have a lot of work, ergo, you should have some assistance!!

[see Riley we can ALL be pretentious]

why don't you just get a job that pays better? or that's more fun?

[maya that's so centrist of you-]

Wh- of…course I…

[ But she frowns. And she trails off, biting down on her bottom lip and thinking. Really thinking. ]

I…was happy when I first started, and I took to it. It was like…it was the first thing that felt like mine, and…it was great, having something I could do with Cairo, but…

[ She thinks back to the summer before high school and how nervous she was. She thinks back to tryouts and swearing both of them would get in. She thinks back to that bittersweet feeling, when results went up and it was just her. ]

Not…once I got to high school.

Ho ho ho! Merry freaking Christmas!

Your Secret Santa recipient this year is Alex Drake ("drake" on the network). Please buy, make, or otherwise procure her a nice gift before December 26! You can give this directly, or label it clearly and drop it off at Crowe Clinic C/O Hawkeye Pierce. (Or drop it off at Crowe Clinic C/O Alex Drake, I mean... she's a doctor too)

Remember: Saint Nick is watching, and he knows where you live!

Happy Holidays, etcetera, and so forth,
Santa Claus

[ Riley stares at the message and just— ]

I think there's been a mistake! I signed up my friend for this, not myself!!

[ Riley walks slow to keep the sound of talons clacking on hardwood from echoing. Unlike most of the times he's come to visit, Atem isn't immediately bombarded by Maple, leaving it just the two of them right now.

God, she would love a Maple distraction right now. ]

So...why demon, this time?

[ It's not the most obvious question. But, she never got to ask why nephilim, after all. ]

You sincerely have to be joking. Sure! Just go out and get a job, like it's easy!!
I will have you know that this isn't exactly something I have a lot of experience in.
I admit it! Aside from when I FIRST got here, the only jobs I've gotten have been entirely through nepotism.
Just running out and finding a better paying job isn't exactly something you can just do on a whim, especially not when most rich people are just looking for muscle to help guard them and I am NOT interested in that.

And furthermore! What's fun has NOTHING to do with this! This is about taking responsibility for mistakes made and doing something decent. That's all that matters to me right now.

[ Why is it every single conversation they have ends up like this... ]

so

are you saying you DON'T want a job at the mermaid bar then

[it might be maya's totally-only-orca-related inclination to maybe troll folks a little bit. Especially when they make it easy.]

it's not technically nepotism right

Edited (i can close my html) 2021-12-11 10:38 (UTC)

But you kept at it, even though it sucked and you felt like dogshit?

[ She never said that, but what would it have taken for things to play out the way they did in the story she told him, logically? Her confirmation just now is all he needed to sound surer in his suddenly harsh assessment. ]

And did you have any other hobbies, do anything else at all as a pick-me-up?

Ho ho ho! Don't question Santa Claus!

The knife cuts both ways, kiddo. You sign people up, they get to sign you up too.

[Atem shrugs!]

I had to pay Mana to end the temp early. She wouldn't cancel it, just switch...and, I figured anything would be better than what I was before.

[He...behaved like a real asshole. Forgot some very important truths. Broke promises.]

That monster type -- it really messed me up!

[ wait— ]

You're offering me a JOB???
That was a job offer??

well
you need money
and i have money

so it works out for us both, right?

[ She feels the need to defend herself. And she almost does, to say it wasn’t like that all the time. To say she still enjoyed cheerleading, being active and physical. But, well. ]

…No. I mean- I’d listen to…podcasts or music, but… Every time I did something for myself, it was ‘cause…Cai made me.

[ She hunches her shoulders, just a little. ]

I just— it was the only thing I was ever good at, Steve. The only thing I… [ The forbidden topic. Her stomach twists in knots. ] …wasn’t immediately compared to my brother about. I thought if I quit, I…

[ Her skin feels like it’s crawling. She sighs to push back a shiver. ]

I don’t know. I know it all sounds stupid.

Not fair!! You know, you should really implement a rule where you can ONLY sign up yourself.

Fine, I’ll play along this year… Do you know her? Any hints, tips? I’ve kind of been a little unplugged for awhile here.

[ The only times she looked at the network all of November it was in a feverish haze where the letters all started doing a do-si-do. She knows so little about what’s gone on outside of her immediate circle. ]

[ She pauses on her way to the kitchen, turning her head around at an angle that would be uncomfortable we’re she not a harpy. As she does, Atem might be able to catch sight of a few jagged lines across her right temple, mostly hidden under wisps of feathery red hair. ]

The nephilim. You became a demon to stop being a nephilim. [ Just. Making sure she’s got that right. ]

…Is, uh… Is this one better?

[ The word feels like needles pricking at the inside of her mouth. I thought you were better— No, she shouldn’t… At least his poor choices were fueled by a change in biology. Hers, on the other hand… She can’t keep blaming every misstep on the fact that she’s crazy. ]

But I haven’t had a single bit of experience in food service! I could be terrible at it!!
And isn’t this something you need to consult with others over? Like Dandy or something?
This cannot be how this whole process works, can it?

But then how would all the Scrooges be dragged kicking and screaming into the holiday spirit? I'm doing you a favor, really.

She's a psychologist. Pretty new here. I think she's a lich now? That's all you're getting.

[ Normally Riley would make a show of saying how she’s not a Scrooge, and how dragging people into this against their will could be considered a form of harassment, and how not everyone celebrates Christmas and didn’t they have this discussion last year, Santa Claus, and he’s going to get himself in hot water one day—

But the second part of that message. It stops her. ]

A psychologist?
I wasn’t aware there were any of those here.

[ A lich scares her. It shouldn’t, she knows not every lich is the same, she’s had good experiences with some, but—

From the very start, she’s thought that would be the worst sort of monster to become. ]

Does she work anywhere?

They come and go a lot. It's good, though, right? God knows we all need some psychological help around here.

(Except me, obviously. I'm fine. But we can't all be magical spirits of Christmas cheer!)

She's not working anywhere officially as far as I know, but I hear Crowe Clinic's trying to snap her up.

Is she going to be vetted?
It’s important if she’s vetted.
People need to know if they can trust her.

[ She ignores part of the message entirely. She has no desire to play pretend right now, not when she knows this is the man who let Fabius Bile have access to a whole clinic of vulnerable people. ]

[That's fair. He can't even argue the point, that's just... that's fair.]

Yes. Thoroughly.

We're not letting it happen again. I promised Steve, and I'm promising you. I'm not letting anything like that slip through ever again.

And sessions monitored.
Or something.

Someone else’s judgment if she talks to patients about their personal problems.
They would be incredibly vulnerable.
They might not be able to tell if she doesn’t have their best interests at heart.

That sort of thing doesn’t go away. If she betrays their trust.

[Okay, yeah, screw trying to have this conversation as Santa Claus. It feels... wrong, somehow. He quickly switches username.]

I understand that. What I'm not sure of is how you balance that with patient confidentiality. I mean, if people are seeing a psychologist, they're not going to want me or Lust listening in, are they? Especially not if they want to talk shit about us.

If we take her on as an employee, I'll give it some serious thought. But I don't know how we monitor sessions safely. I'm open to any ideas you have.

[The amount her head can turn is always wild, always surprising -- Atem knew her as a human first, it feels like, from the other world.

Is that scar new...?]

Mm.

[A nod, affirming -- it's an answer to both. His blue tail flicks out of the way so that he can take a seat at her little kitchen-table, the one he'd hidden under when he was stuck in his travel form.]

It felt like...there was a spotlight on in my mind, all of the time, lighting up everything that happened that I didn't agree with.

[He couldn't look away, couldn't ignore it, couldn't rationalize the cost away, couldn't forget every single person who'd been hurt by monsters long enough to try to understand why it was happening.]

It's still my fault, though, for acting on the feelings I had. I was a real jerk! I'm sorry.

[A beat.]

And then I became a living sphere puzzle with a couple hundred eyes when the fog came in, and I couldn't move without feeling sick, so I traded in 20 coins to make that stop. And get my hands back. Being like this is much easier!

I don’t know. But patient confidentiality doesn’t seem to matter if your therapist is just going to go and spew your whole life to the guy who want to kill you and then act like you’re a nutcase on the network.

[ —Er. Shit, wait. ]

Psychiatrist. Whatever. Look, I don’t know. I’ve never done anything like this before. The only time I’ve tried, it went poorly. All I know is if that happens again to anyone i won’t let it slide. And I won’t forgive anyone who could’ve prevented it.

RYSLIG; ic inbox

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<KrisKringle>

<CheeryCherry> shoots this back rq im sorry

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<CheeryCherry>

cw: internalized ableism

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<KrisKringle>

<CheeryCherry>

<KrisKringle>

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<KrisKringle>

<CheeryCherry> | cw: medical abuse/therapy malpractice discussion

<whichdoctor>

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<CheeryCherry> cw: internalized ableism

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, CHEERYCHERRY. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 019.46.820.17 * CHEERYCHERRY has joined 019.46.820.17 <CHEERYCHERRY> It's Riley! <CHEERYCHERRY> Please leave a message! <CHEERYCHERRY>** Please be someone with their priorities sorted out properly!