[ The moment Lila's gone from her room, Riley's strings snap and she sinks to her knees. She bites down every single tear until she's silent. If she's too loud, maybe Cairo will hear. Maybe Atem, through the wall. She can't have that. Don't look at her. She can't have anyone look at her.
Can't have anyone look at this pathetic child who can't do anything for herself.
She stays like that for awhile, not even bothering to fight off the poison inside her. Not what she's heard from others, not what she's told herself. Every single internalized thought sits with her. Maybe Daniel was just a danger to her. Maybe she should've just kept it all in. Maybe she should've just gone herself and let him kill her. Maybe it would've fixed everything. She has to fix it. Fix it.
(She's just like him, just like Aunamee, where did she go wrong, when did she become this—)
She stays like that for a long time. Until she falls asleep on the floor of her bedroom, hands clutching at her temples. One last thought consumes her as she does, and it's strange and funny. But, maybe it's because she's tried so hard to stop— no, what was it Giorno said?
...To kill it. That disgusting thing.
Swallowing her sobs into her until it feels like she's going to choke, in this moment, she's never felt more like a little kid. ]
cw: suicidal ideation...again......
Can't have anyone look at this pathetic child who can't do anything for herself.
She stays like that for awhile, not even bothering to fight off the poison inside her. Not what she's heard from others, not what she's told herself. Every single internalized thought sits with her. Maybe Daniel was just a danger to her. Maybe she should've just kept it all in. Maybe she should've just gone herself and let him kill her. Maybe it would've fixed everything. She has to fix it. Fix it.
(She's just like him, just like Aunamee, where did she go wrong, when did she become this—)
She stays like that for a long time. Until she falls asleep on the floor of her bedroom, hands clutching at her temples. One last thought consumes her as she does, and it's strange and funny. But, maybe it's because she's tried so hard to stop— no, what was it Giorno said?
...To kill it. That disgusting thing.
Swallowing her sobs into her until it feels like she's going to choke, in this moment, she's never felt more like a little kid. ]